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by Matty11
Tue Aug 13, 2019 5:37 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: The rock
Replies: 8
Views: 331

Re: The rock

Good one Colm. I can see what you mean by 'plumped' out, but essentially there is plenty in there for those listening to connect with. young girls - not sure if 'young' is needed there, implied with girls, and perhaps it sends  the wrong message in these abusive times? Every Summer wheat's gentle ca...
by Matty11
Sat Jul 20, 2019 5:56 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Striving for Perfection
Replies: 3
Views: 155

Re: Striving for Perfection

Occasionally I get a poem published in one of those journals that no one buys except the contributors and no one reads .....stronger with a verb ending? except the contributors' family members, recipients of a gift copy and they only read that single poem ...in general, don't split adjective/noun (...
by Matty11
Sat Jul 20, 2019 5:36 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Epistle to Ms Austen
Replies: 8
Views: 265

Re: Epistle to Ms Austen

the feel of this one is of the N sorting many personal issues out in said solitude in a kind of mind-whirl which does give me insight into the N's character. Thank you Linda. Insightful comment. I've been told this is more a technique than a form: The repetition of an end word at the beginning of t...
by Matty11
Thu Jul 18, 2019 5:30 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Epistle to Ms Austen
Replies: 8
Views: 265

Re: Epistle to Ms Austen

Thank you Dave and Tracy. Anadiplosis -  word for the day. http://www.tangledbranch.com/boards/images/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif Indeed, I didn't know that and agree with you on epistle :) There is a sharing of generalisations, That is true. After all, to make another generalisation, spiritual journey...
by Matty11
Tue Jul 16, 2019 4:26 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Epistle to Ms Austen
Replies: 8
Views: 265

Epistle to Ms Austen

Dear Jane, although I do not have your mind, A mind that makes moral choices so clear, Clear enough now for me to right my wrongs, The wrongs that take refuge in life's muddles, For muddles marinate in solitude; Yet solitude gives thought for humankind, A humankind in which we both belong, Belong be...
by Matty11
Tue Jul 16, 2019 4:24 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Grandpa's Row Boat
Replies: 5
Views: 208

Re: Grandpa's Row Boat

hi Linda Very much enjoyed the write: it is not a world I know, the rail life or the fishing one, but you gave me glimpse. On the crit. side I don't feel you need all croaking/cursing/hissing; and I'd cut most often. best Phil Grandpa's Row Boat Night was filled with loon calls, croaking dog fish in...
by Matty11
Sat Jul 13, 2019 6:19 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic:  Late Tomatoes
Replies: 7
Views: 227

Re:  Late Tomatoes

Very much enjoyed this Tracy. Particularly the tone and perspective.

best

Phil
by Matty11
Sat Jul 13, 2019 5:56 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Broken Homes
Replies: 12
Views: 381

Re: Broken Homes

I've just found where that advice came from... http://www.everypoet.org/pffa/showthread.php?9958-Lines-and-Linebreaks&s= I do agree with the comment:   A general rule, one of those ones with occasional exceptions, is that you should never separate a noun from its preceding adjective. It's a boring, ...
by Matty11
Fri Jul 12, 2019 7:02 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Broken Homes
Replies: 12
Views: 381

Re: Broken Homes

Some course notes I found:   First rule of the line: there are no rules. There are, however, some strong guidelines that will generally serve you well. For example, usually you shouldn't break after an article or conjunctive word -- such as "the" or "and" -- because they're unimportant words in most...
by Matty11
Fri Jul 12, 2019 8:11 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Broken Homes
Replies: 12
Views: 381

Re: Broken Homes

Enjoyed the progressions - sometimes/some/most - the hauntings, the sudden destructiveness, the gradual neglect.

My suggestion for S2 :
 a sideways glance and an off key tone
of voice inquiring about a preference
for Chinese or Italian,
never decided.
best

Phil