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by Mark
Mon Jan 14, 2019 5:56 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Mostly
Replies: 11
Views: 7251

Mostly

.

Mostly

The past is pain
and the future is fear.
The present is everywhere,
and whenever is again too near.
by Mark
Tue Dec 11, 2018 2:36 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Harvest
Replies: 11
Views: 11031

Re: Harvest

Thanks for further comments. 
by Mark
Sat Dec 08, 2018 2:31 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: He Who Knows
Replies: 14
Views: 9167

Re: He Who Knows

Do they still make professors like that? Enjoyed the read, the piece is prosy but rhythmic. 
by Mark
Sat Dec 08, 2018 2:27 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: loose clockwork
Replies: 15
Views: 10619

Re: loose clockwork

The title's brilliant - imagine a Tom poem to follow. It made me expect some kind of a nutter but subtle - it does work for Ike's piece too.
by Mark
Fri Dec 07, 2018 2:16 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: loose clockwork
Replies: 15
Views: 10619

Re: loose clockwork

Loved the title but the poem disappointed. The first line perplexed me, chronometer-wise, and then the middle sounded like a basic narcissist/empath thing going on and the ending plain jarred. Sorry if this seems unfair because I don't get it.
by Mark
Fri Dec 07, 2018 2:10 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Frank Goes to Heaven
Replies: 20
Views: 13546

Re: Frank Goes to Heaven

I like Frank's exit line and the dust. Is there a reason for capitalizing 'small'? What is the reason for the day's stale sweetness? On rereading, I took it that the subway or station platform was his experience of 'going into the light' and as such it's an original representation but if so, why wo...
by Mark
Fri Dec 07, 2018 2:05 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Harvest
Replies: 11
Views: 11031

Re: Harvest

I feel good too, also too busy to write much in creative vein. I feel recovered from my loss of five years ago, just changed, a bit wiser maybe. I've been fortunate to start a new and interesting life here.

 
by Mark
Thu Dec 06, 2018 3:09 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Harvest
Replies: 11
Views: 11031

Re: Harvest

Opening adjusted.
by Mark
Thu Dec 06, 2018 3:07 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Harvest
Replies: 11
Views: 11031

Re: Harvest

I don't agree, if I understand you right. That first bit that becomes redundant serves as the gateway to the field of the poem, so it is vital in that sense. The trick though is to recognize that redundancy, all too often we cling to the opening. 

Hi Dave, thanks, trust all is well with you.  
by Mark
Tue Dec 04, 2018 1:07 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Frank Goes to Heaven
Replies: 20
Views: 13546

Re: Frank Goes to Heaven

I like Frank's exit line and the dust. Is there a reason for capitalizing 'small'? What is the reason for the day's stale sweetness? On rereading, I took it that the subway or station platform was his experience of 'going into the light' and as such it's an original representation but if so, why wou...