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by Dave
Sun May 31, 2020 5:42 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: In Daylight
Replies: 11
Views: 6845

Re: In Daylight

Horrific crime and horrific poem. Suitably disgusting in its portrayal of a disgusting episode. Whether it is accurate, it bring the certainly leaves a bad taste - not because it is a bad taste poem but because of its directness. I would not change anything.
Dave
 
by Dave
Sun May 31, 2020 5:39 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Hero Wanted:
Replies: 9
Views: 4916

Re: Hero Wanted:

Hey Linda, A worthy and timely poem that could however be radically cut in my opinion to remove much of the distraction. Since in your explanation you have yourself distilled the main contrast perhaps your poem could do the same. I hesitate to suggest - many people hate it and think it impertinent b...
by Dave
Fri May 29, 2020 9:29 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Music
Replies: 13
Views: 7799

Re: Music

Hi Colm Thought-provoking, which IMO is good. Positive about human achievements which is uplifting - i love music. And dreary when comparing those achievements with the bad parts - just my view as you know. The conclusion I simply did not really get. The idea behind yes but the phrase makes no real ...
by Dave
Fri May 29, 2020 9:23 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Red or dead.
Replies: 11
Views: 6624

Re: Red or dead.

Clearly the poem provokes a lot of thoughts. 
Dave
 
by Dave
Fri May 29, 2020 9:22 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Journey
Replies: 9
Views: 5116

Re: Journey

Hi Mark
I found the poem really moving from the second stanza onwards. The first seemed quite a long preamble to me and while it adds reflection to the rest I found it less engaging. It is so wonderfully overshadowed by the rest, which is touching and deep and emotional.
Dave
 
by Dave
Sun May 24, 2020 3:32 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: the clothes she wore
Replies: 8
Views: 5005

Re: the clothes she wore

Hey all Well I seem to have missed a shitstorm yesterday. What a pity. I have no objections to a bit of passion. Just so it is clear, I have written a PM (friendly and positive I hope) to Murmac. I won't go into it here but the gist is: I am happy he is writing on this site; I appreciate the fact th...
by Dave
Sun May 17, 2020 5:33 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: the clothes she wore
Replies: 8
Views: 5005

Re: the clothes she wore

Thanks for all the generous replies and comments.
Dave
by Dave
Sun May 17, 2020 5:32 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Garden Love
Replies: 6
Views: 3779

Re: Garden Love

I enjoyed this. I find no sadness in nature but wonder. Likewise in the human capacity for transferring human feeling to animals: and doesn't my cat know it.
 
by Dave
Sun May 17, 2020 5:30 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Distraught
Replies: 8
Views: 4698

Re: Distraught

Most definitely - I have regular meltdowns of all kinds. Sorry, what was I saying again....
by Dave
Sun May 17, 2020 5:28 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: So Sad
Replies: 4
Views: 3009

Re: So Sad

Hey I see exactly what Colm is getting at: this is basically not only prose but is just a straightforward statement. It tells us something but does not show. IN other words, whether poem or not, it offers too little to really do more than a piece of journalism. Interestingly, if posted as art in an ...