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- Sun Oct 07, 2018 8:55 am
- Forum: Post Your Poems
- Topic: She Asked Before Leaving, Can You Sing?
- Replies: 23
- Views: 14978
Re: She Asked Before Leaving, Can You Sing?
I like to think trees across the field love me tad awkward. Why do they love you after they've gone, not while here after you’re gone; tonight, Gemini blurs, love Gemini. This is what you do best passing slower than other bodies— slower than bodies sets contrasts. para...
- Sun Sep 30, 2018 4:09 pm
- Forum: Post Your Poems
- Topic: Passing On
- Replies: 9
- Views: 6881
Re: Passing On
Thanks! I'm an old farm kid of Irish blood, but raised in Kentucky. Tobacco, race horses, not so many potatoes outside my grandmother's garden.
- Sun Sep 30, 2018 1:24 pm
- Forum: Post Your Poems
- Topic: At which precise moment did you know.. revision
- Replies: 15
- Views: 10576
Re: At which precise moment did you know.. revision
Hi Dave, Nice one. I read the frost, geese, footprints, dew, garden, webs, morning, mist, house, and book as all simple direct images that mark the presence and the absence. I feel like those images have done that before, none really surprised me, but they're handled adeptly here. I enjoyed the ec...
- Sun Sep 30, 2018 1:09 pm
- Forum: Post Your Poems
- Topic: Passing On
- Replies: 9
- Views: 6881
Re: Passing On
This boy can move, like a younger me among potato drills, .......Love the language, but distracted wondering what potato drills are cool quick fingers stooping and sorting. His bucket rattling with every deposit, razors and clams .........here I get he's not bucketing potatoes, ...
- Mon Sep 17, 2018 12:57 pm
- Forum: Post Your Poems
- Topic: Remission's corridors (Title changed)
- Replies: 8
- Views: 5622
Re: Remission's corridors (Title changed)
Played around. Couldn't quite sentence today. Thus: Worlds coalesce as he travels, first time explorer on worn paths. Net curtains, gauze veil or Vaseline, his lens sees through. Cheap hotel rooms in Asia Minor and operating theatres, surgically similar in their clinical ability to get you in, ...
- Mon Sep 17, 2018 12:36 pm
- Forum: Post Your Poems
- Topic: Shots
- Replies: 4
- Views: 3769
Re: Shots
“hahaha, the man is alive” flying, diving, crashing -- yet he comes up and does another dive? line of cocaine? lining up all of the shots booze? drugs? bullets? down one goes in rapturous glee “oh, what a jolly good show” popping pilots into splotches in the sky war...
- Mon Sep 17, 2018 10:56 am
- Forum: Post Your Poems
- Topic: Union Cafe
- Replies: 13
- Views: 9301
Re: Union Cafe
I also think the ending is strong. I like the mix of humor and concern. I have a personal bias that when I read a very narrative poem, I think it should just be a story or blog post, or that it's a great first draft for getting thoughts and images out before a total rewrite. I know it's just my pers...
- Sun Sep 16, 2018 7:35 pm
- Forum: Introduce Yourself Here
- Topic: Greetings From Across the Pond
- Replies: 9
- Views: 24366
Re: Greetings From Across the Pond
Nice to meet you, Deb!
- Fri Sep 14, 2018 7:57 pm
- Forum: Post Your Poems
- Topic: Falling
- Replies: 5
- Views: 4242
Re: Falling
I’m sick and tired and hyper ...2 ands doesn't serve. also, no images Love is hate and sadness is fleeting generalities One moment there the next gone tells and generalities Without understanding, I stare show instead of tell Catching a glimpse of you the one ...
- Thu Sep 13, 2018 8:26 am
- Forum: Post Your Poems
- Topic: Leaving
- Replies: 11
- Views: 7522
Re: Leaving
But let me explain why I'm laughing. I was going to post this poem I've been wrestling for years. In its various forms it's a my "I've had it with the way men view women" poem. I posted another one instead, because this forum appears to be mostly men, and I didn't want a rabbit hole instead of feedb...