Climbing (revised)

Matty11 · Post by **Matty11** » Sun Oct 21, 2018 2:50 pm

Thanks AT. Sounds are not absent rather they are not what they seem...don't believe everything you hear

cheers

Phil

Post by **Colm Roe** » Sun Oct 21, 2018 7:25 pm

I read this as 'just' a poem about climbing.
Dusting the blister...is a fab S. The chalk (and mental chalk) easing the challenge.
I'm not a climber, but have climbed, and enjoyed this lots...especially the last S.

Matty11 · Post by **Matty11** » Sun Oct 21, 2018 11:50 pm

Colm Roe wrote: ↑
Sun Oct 21, 2018 7:25 pm
I read this as 'just' a poem about climbing.
Dusting the blister...is a fab S. The chalk (and mental chalk) easing the challenge.
I'm not a climber, but have climbed, and enjoyed this lots...especially the last S.

Thanks Colm. I'm not a 'climber' either, but I do like a hike up a hill (in this case the poem relates to walks 'climbing' Pen-Y-Fan and Snowdon)

cheers

Phil

Post by **Colm Roe** » Mon Oct 22, 2018 7:32 pm

Still prefer the original.
'comma'd' is the only snag for me?

Matty11 · Post by **Matty11** » Thu Oct 25, 2018 5:39 am

Thanks for taking another look Colm. Yes, comma'd is an opinion divider.

cheers

phil

Post by **Colm Roe** » Thu Oct 25, 2018 6:46 pm

Sorry M, still prefer the original.

Matty11 · Post by **Matty11** » Fri Oct 26, 2018 9:01 am

Thanks for taking another look AT and Colm. One of those I'll probably revise endlessly!

cheers

Phil

Dave · Post by **Dave** » Fri Oct 26, 2018 9:36 am

Actually you now have 3 good poems. I prefer the original and comma'd is a stumbling point. It's almost like another poem suddenly intrudes

The Tangled Branch Discussion Forums

For writers and readers of poetry