The Tangled Branch Discussion Forums

'basically a part-condensation of the philosophies of Sonia Ricotti and Eckhart Tolle'
'It was a crappy little warm-up poem, knocked off in a couple of throwaway minutes'...seriously?

'also the syllable count of 6-6-8-9 as 6-7-8-9 would have been more satisfying although no-one would notice that'...the fact that you counted them (before or after) says it all.

'It remains an abstract surface on which to project reality' (Dave) 

'vague' (Colm)
 
And please don't waste any more time defending it. (Or yourself)

 

Would recommend a closing line of:

"whenever again is too near", unless that porks your cadence.

Just my take.

T