The Tangled Branch Discussion Forums

In keeping with other years I am reworking a Poem from NAPO to see what happens.
From a harmony 
of green field
and liquid sky
cattle emerge

one by one
their heads
like a melody 
of semibreves,
then crochets,
glide down this rural page,
demisemiquaver
straight into and out of
a trombone
resting on a shoulder
under a white cowboy hat.

Cowtails clap and beat flies,
and they reveal their true rhythm.

Hi Dave, this one reminds me of the poem "cow songs" by M.E. Hope. I can't post a link to it but it was published in Rattle. I am using a loaner laptop. The Geeks held my computer hostage for 5 days and then sent me home with it still sick to order the parts for it myself so it will be a while before it gets well. I want to discuss the use of some interesting words and ideas in this special poem of yours and I will when I have my PC back.

Well, the ending couplet of the piece is unique in poetry annals in that it conveys imagery of a cow swatting flies off its arse with its tail. Remarkable writing. And indeed, this is an honest image of cattle. Conversely, the rest seemed romanticised to me but then I know cows.



     

Like it Dave. The concluding reality check is set up by the imagined analogy. I did struggle with the cowboy hat because that brought another cultural baggage. 'true rhythm' is a perfect note to end on. A blunt title 'cows' works for me since the poem doesn't need a signpost for its content.

cheers

Phil

Very nice writing, Dave.  I like the title as is, cause of all the musical references throughout.  

Spent tons of youthful time at my uncle's dairy farm... cows are very cool creatures.

I do struggle a bit with the reference to cowboy hat in the context...........

Nice bit of writing.

Aj

I found the image of the cow's heads likened to semibreves totally delightful. I had to google the word and found the description of the notes to be "hollow ovals" OMG--perfect. Those whitefaced heads bobbing up and down the scales, I love it. I love cows. I only know them at remove but I am familiar with the how much dairy farmers love their cows.

I'm less disturbed by the cowboy hat than by the introduction of crocheting into the musical theme. I can see why the weaving of the herd down the page becomes almost irresistible but might there be a way to use a score instead? 

I love the whimsical nature of this poem that deals with cows. Cows, after all, are an architype of the highest order in the human psyche.

Once you see the cows' white faces as musical notes the fence wires could double as a musical stave

In this musical context I saw crochet as a single note, rather than reading it as crochet the verb.

I've never really thought of cows as musical, but a happy herd can sound quite melodic at a distance.  As part of general rural 'background noises'

Gyppo

Hey everyone,
thanks for all the comments, much appreciated - the cows which to thank everyone for all the love too. I won't answer all the individual comments, except perhaps the cowboy hat, which I can understand in the context of the Poem may indeed not fit but was included simply because that is how it was in the original Video that inspired the Poem. One of those Videos that has gone seriously viral.
[font]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qs_-emj1qR4[/font]
Dave
 

Ahhhhhh... Dave - all has been revealed !!!!!!!  You have truly painted a musical scene, vivid, and amazingly true to the video.  Wonderful.  If I may, that farmer draws the bovine like a "cowed horner".  And the cows formed their line in the grass, like water buffalo and musk ox.......... 

It is the musicality of your poem that rules.

Aj