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Moon Landing

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indar
Posts: 2908
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 8:00 am

Moon Landing

Post by indar » Sat Jul 20, 2019 7:37 pm

Image








When the advanced race 
of Ribbed Ameba landed
on the moon,
they globbed aghast
at irrefutable evidence:
there in ancient moondust
the bodily imprint
of a Ribbed Ameba child
that predated by millenia
the scientific consensus
they had evolved
only after the great extinction
of the first wave of life.

 

Dave
Posts: 1991
Joined: Mon Jan 08, 2018 9:07 am

Re: Moon Landing

Post by Dave » Mon Jul 22, 2019 11:53 am

This was fun until it provided that great kicker at the end. Thought provoking.
Dave

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Tracy Mitchell
Posts: 3179
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 3:58 pm

Re: Moon Landing

Post by Tracy Mitchell » Mon Jul 22, 2019 7:45 pm

Good Lord, Indar -- what scope of vision, what depth in so few words. 

It is a blunt and accurate assessment that we are, relatively speaking, ribbed ameba.

I agree with Dave about the devastating effect of the closing lines.  What tickled me more, though, what this phrase:  ". . . they globbed aghast/at irrefutable evidence:. . . ."

Powerful and poetic-- the total package in this poem, Indar.

Bravo.

T

indar
Posts: 2908
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 8:00 am

Re: Moon Landing

Post by indar » Tue Jul 23, 2019 11:33 am

Thank you both Dave and Tracy. Trouble is this one does not stand alone without the photo. So what I propose is a poetry forum strictly for poems that require visual aids. Will you be making plans to start one anytime soon Tracy?

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Tracy Mitchell
Posts: 3179
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 3:58 pm

Re: Moon Landing

Post by Tracy Mitchell » Tue Jul 23, 2019 11:40 am

Indar - check Founder's Forum
 

poet-e
Posts: 247
Joined: Wed Jun 19, 2019 3:10 pm

Re: Moon Landing

Post by poet-e » Tue Sep 24, 2019 9:00 pm

Thank you both Dave and Tracy. Trouble is this one does not stand alone without the photo. So what I propose is a poetry forum strictly for poems that require visual aids. Will you be making plans to start one anytime soon Tracy?

Can you make poem look like the boot print? It's so iconic....

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