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We Sold His Grandma's House

General Poetry - post, comment, review, critique
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indar
Posts: 2908
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 8:00 am

We Sold His Grandma's House

Post by indar » Tue Dec 03, 2019 3:57 pm

Every stitch of clothes he owned
lay in piles around him,
one pair of shoes
walked down at the heels,
he always slipped his feet in
rather than untie them.

The room appeared
uninhabited
it took his cousin searching
to find his body
beneath his sleeping bag.

We'd been in and out
moving furniture,
cleaning cupboards
and never guessed his whereabouts.

indar
Posts: 2908
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 8:00 am

Re: We Sold His Grandma's House

Post by indar » Tue Dec 03, 2019 3:59 pm

This is a grief-write. I am devastated. I'll be back to participate in a little while

ajduclos
Posts: 1746
Joined: Mon Apr 01, 2019 1:35 pm

Re: We Sold His Grandma's House

Post by ajduclos » Tue Dec 03, 2019 4:23 pm

I hear...  there are no words... I send you warmth.............

Aj

Sharon Leigh
Posts: 272
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 4:07 am
Location: Midwest US

Re: We Sold His Grandma's House

Post by Sharon Leigh » Thu Dec 05, 2019 3:57 am

I am so sorry, for your loss - It's difficult to find words... all my condolences at this most trying time, indar 🌷
"This creature of the poem may assemble itself into a being with its own centrifugal force."-- Sharon Olds

Matty11
Posts: 1585
Joined: Thu Jan 11, 2018 7:58 pm

Re: We Sold His Grandma's House

Post by Matty11 » Fri Dec 06, 2019 4:39 am

My condolences too at this time. Poetry does help.

Take care

Phil

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Colm Roe
Posts: 2697
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 12:45 am

Re: We Sold His Grandma's House

Post by Colm Roe » Fri Dec 06, 2019 7:07 pm

Sorry to hear that this is real Linda.
It's very well written, and with great restraint.
His story silently screams, barely hidden behind your careful words.
I get the feeling the almost matter of fact way it's written reflects a resignation...your 
family did all they could for him, and all that's left is this!
S1 in particular paints a painful picture, the shoes especially. Just one pair  :cry:  
'down on his heels' is a clever way of showing his situation. The way you knew
details, like the way he wore them and even how they were worn down tells us
volumes about way he wasn't a family outcast...he was always considered!   
My thoughts are with you Linda. 

Dave
Posts: 1991
Joined: Mon Jan 08, 2018 9:07 am

Re: We Sold His Grandma's House

Post by Dave » Sun Dec 08, 2019 11:58 am

Hey Indar
A devastating experience. I am very sorry that you had to be confronted by such a sad tragedy. As Colm indicates the poem benefits from its simplicity and stark truth. A very powerful piece born of grief. My thoughts are with you.

Dave
 

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