I want to say this straightforwardly,
in plain words,
not an easy task when the subject is abstract.
I strung pink lights between my palm trees,
solar powered,
and made a sign that leans against
the center tree that says:
keep the lovelight burning,
decorations for Valentine's Day.
My way of demonstrating love:
making something beautiful for my neighbors,
living as lightly in this world as I can,
leaving as much as possible for others,
hoping for the best.
Welcome to The Tangled Branch! Join us.
Dearly Beloved
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Tracy Mitchell
- Posts: 3444
- Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 3:58 pm
Re: Dearly Beloved
Wonderful title– it does so much. The Speaker opens the poem as would an officiant addressing an assemblage of family and close friends. By the time the poem concludes, the reader assured of the genuineness of the opening really. Merriam says “love-light” means a radiance of affection, which the Speaker bestows on her neighbors, us readers, and whoever might occasion themselves into the ambit of this radiance. And it is clear the Speaker invites and welcomes everyone. It feels like a spiritual welcoming.
I don’t have a problem with “lovelight”, but I think hyphenating is the technical preferred usage: “love-light”. Either way-- such a wonderful place and use for the word you have found.
Last thing--consider what Stanza #1 contributes to the poem. It feels to me like a running start only. In my view it is the much stronger first line to be “I strung pink lights. . . .” If you look at the poem without S. 1, I am not sure there would be an argument to re-insert it, either at the beginning, or elsewhere in the poem. But I do think when a person is looking for a toe-hold into a first draft, this can be an excellent starting stanza, even if it will eventually need to come out. You know, nail soup.
Cheers.
T
I don’t have a problem with “lovelight”, but I think hyphenating is the technical preferred usage: “love-light”. Either way-- such a wonderful place and use for the word you have found.
Last thing--consider what Stanza #1 contributes to the poem. It feels to me like a running start only. In my view it is the much stronger first line to be “I strung pink lights. . . .” If you look at the poem without S. 1, I am not sure there would be an argument to re-insert it, either at the beginning, or elsewhere in the poem. But I do think when a person is looking for a toe-hold into a first draft, this can be an excellent starting stanza, even if it will eventually need to come out. You know, nail soup.
Cheers.
T