Occasionally I get a poem
published in one of those journals
that no one buys except
the contributors and no one
reads except the contributors' family
members, recipients of a gift
copy and they only read that single
poem by their loved one and say
it's really nice
but what does it mean
and I wonder why I keep
writing but of course it's because
of the online writing forum peopled
by fellow poets with whom
I've shared poems for years
and for whom I keep trying
to come up with new topics and viewpoints
I haven't already expounded upon
at least ten times.
OK this is my first attempt to line break according to the article Phil posted which I am still trying to process
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Striving for Perfection
- Tracy Mitchell
- Posts: 3405
- Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 3:58 pm
Re: Striving for Perfection
Nice writing exercise. :) I also like the sentiment. But as one god-awful long run-on sentence, I don't know, maybe it works as a poem.
And for me, sometimes it takes circling back for 10+ stabs at a topic before it starts to feel right.
So glad to count myself as one of the fellow poets.
Cheers.
T
btw - super line breaks.
And for me, sometimes it takes circling back for 10+ stabs at a topic before it starts to feel right.
So glad to count myself as one of the fellow poets.
Cheers.
T
btw - super line breaks.
Re: Striving for Perfection
Hi Linda, my understanding of that article, is that the writer should not snap a line. A line should be meaningful with enjambement extending that meaning. Therefore, for instance, the usual rule is not to separate adjective from noun at the break.Occasionally I get a poem
published in one of those journals
that no one buys except
the contributors and no one reads.....stronger with a verb ending?
except the contributors' family
members, recipients of a gift copy
and they only read that single poem...in general, don't split adjective/noun (see article)
by their loved one and say
it's really nice
but what does it mean
and I wonder why I keep writing
but of course it's because
of the online writing forum
peopled by fellow poets
with whom I've shared poems
for years and for whom I keep trying
to come up with new topics and viewpoints
I haven't already expounded upon
at least ten times.
best
Phil
ps having work published is fun (and a validation from another reader...an editor!)
Re: Striving for Perfection
Oh gosh, I got that one wrong. Will reread the article. Thanks Phil.
Re: Striving for Perfection
peopled??
Neat idea, self-deprecating... I haven't even gotten published in one of those journals, lol.
Love title; get it!
Neat idea, self-deprecating... I haven't even gotten published in one of those journals, lol.
Love title; get it!