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New Family (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

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poet-e
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Joined: Wed Jun 19, 2019 3:10 pm

New Family (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Post by poet-e » Fri Feb 21, 2020 3:50 pm

New Family
Muffled sobs from a body wrapped in beige canvas
Don't Cry. What does crying solve?
Let her be.
Cry as much as you need to.
We still cry ourselves to sleep sometimes, even
him. We can be your new family now.
Don't give her false hope.
Bunch of blind paralytic outcasts,
forced to sit sleep here on this cold hard dirt,
starving, waiting for death.
You call that family?
Sobs amplify as she turns her back towards them Don’t you remember
your first night, how you missed your family?
NO.  I Never
want to see them
again.  How
could they leave me here?
Our families all had their reasons. Don’t
listen to him. We call him Beautiful3 because he
was given much beauty, but has a
hardened heart and cannot
see beauty in anything.
See that man with long dark hair
sleeping next to him? That’s Kindness;
he sees beauty in everything. He gets our water when no villagers are looking and
carries us to where we beg since he is blind and can walk. We
are his eyes and he is our feet. The woman across from him reads and writes,
but she cannot hear. We communicate with her in the sand
or use gestures. Our name for her is putting
our hand over our head like this, showing how smart she is. We
call the man leaning against this tree
behind me Happiness. He brings us laughter with his insights, even
though the villagers call him stupid. The
others are still out begging at the
temple, city gates, and sandy streets. We
are your new family now.
Sobs subside as she faces the sky Scoffs.
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Tracy Mitchell
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Re: New Family (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Post by Tracy Mitchell » Fri Feb 21, 2020 5:41 pm

Wowzers.  :)

I love this unique presentation -- the poem takes some chances, and they pay off big. I am impressed.  You capitalize on the opportunities offered by this format. 

The dialog creates three characters, it seems, one for each vertical column.  I was confused, however, by text in the far-right column of the sixth horizontal box -- it seemed to be a voice more properly belonging in the left column. Other than that the cohesiveness was flawless.

The drama is evident and well presented.  

As far as the Kadesh Collection, I don't know enough to comment on how this fits, continues or expands the collection.

Thanks for posting.

Cheers. 


 

poet-e
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Joined: Wed Jun 19, 2019 3:10 pm

Re: New Family (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Post by poet-e » Sat Feb 22, 2020 11:13 am

Thanks!

By right 6 column, do you mean:
"NO.  I Never want to see them again.  How could they leave me here?"

I had this poem as the opening poem, but changed to the 3rd poem.
It's a group of homeless people with disabilities 'welcoming' a new member.  So all of their families left them there...

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Tracy Mitchell
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Re: New Family (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Post by Tracy Mitchell » Sat Feb 22, 2020 2:59 pm

Poet-e

Yes, that is the passage.  I see now. 
Thanks.

T

indar
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Re: New Family (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Post by indar » Sun Feb 23, 2020 10:10 am

I hardly know where to begin. I see the presentation with its columns and boxes as imitative of an actual modern day Bible or publication of the synoptic gosples.

The Bible is very often a discussion of how members of society should treat one another by voices trying to impose ideas of what is moral and just from positions of leadership or privilege. A test of "uprightness" uses treatment of the widow, orphan or leper as exhibits A,B or C.

In this writing we hear from those BEING discussed. In the basement of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in Northeast Minneapolis (that's for you, Tracy) I heard so much about lepers I was under the impression that the roads and byways of the  "Holyland" were strewn with lepers who had to announce they were unclean lest someone try to approach them. None-the=less the faithful were exhorted to be kind to them.

I live in California. I've spent time in Los Angeles. So that aspect of a modern day application of this "Kaddesh" collection is very real to me. 

But even more immediate is this dialogue discussing the first night of abandonment.

 

indar
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Re: New Family (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Post by indar » Sun Feb 23, 2020 10:18 am

Oh and one more thing---in that discussion we are told of the group members abilities, not disabilities. Big point.

poet-e
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Re: New Family (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Post by poet-e » Mon Feb 24, 2020 10:52 am

Thanks for your thoughts @indar!

Met a seminary prof who doesn't believe there were truly homeless in Bible times or even in California/LA now...

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Tracy Mitchell
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Re: New Family (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Post by Tracy Mitchell » Mon Feb 24, 2020 12:38 pm

poet-e wrote:
Mon Feb 24, 2020 10:52 am
Met a seminary prof who doesn't believe there were truly homeless in Bible times or even in California/LA now...

Wow --  I'd be interested in hearing that explanation. :o :o

poet-e
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Re: New Family (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Post by poet-e » Mon Feb 24, 2020 1:20 pm

He thinks they all have places to live, but panhandle or chose to live on the street...

indar
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Re: New Family (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Post by indar » Mon Feb 24, 2020 3:31 pm

My favorite old saying of late:

There are none so blind as those who WILL NOT see.

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