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Reflection on Father's day

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indar
Posts: 1747
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 3:00 pm

Reflection on Father's day

Post by indar » Mon Jun 22, 2020 5:34 pm

We drove to the back country,
my brother's place,
traditional father's day barbeque.
He relocated there last year
after our mother died
and his son drank himself to death:
maybe suicide,
we don't know.

This was my brother's first,
motherless, childless.
I still have one daughter left
of the three I birthed.

My brother's house is surrounded
by live oaks.
We sat on the deck
six feet apart in the shade
and talked about the mouse invasion
he is fighting
and those good old rock bands
from the seventies. 
 
 

murmac
Posts: 193
Joined: Fri Mar 27, 2020 1:18 am

Post by murmac » Tue Jun 23, 2020 9:17 am

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Last edited by murmac on Wed Jun 24, 2020 1:45 pm, edited 4 times in total.

Dave
Posts: 846
Joined: Mon Jan 08, 2018 4:07 pm

Re: Reflection on Father's day

Post by Dave » Tue Jun 23, 2020 10:58 am

This is a simple reflective piece that allows the reader to fill in the spaces. It is melancholic but never maudlin and provides a gentle canvas for considering life and death, sharing and separation and all the different lives that may be led even within one family.
Thanks

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Mark
Posts: 369
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 11:19 am

Re: Reflection on Father's day

Post by Mark » Tue Jun 23, 2020 8:56 pm

Dave said it well. I've read this several times and despite the geographical, cultural and familial divide can easily find myself there, a survivor, talking about mice and rock legends.  

indar
Posts: 1747
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 3:00 pm

Re: Reflection on Father's day

Post by indar » Wed Jun 24, 2020 3:22 pm

Thank you both Dave and Mark. Yes, some key words: survivors, separation and sharing. 

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Gyppo
Posts: 467
Joined: Sat Mar 31, 2018 9:28 pm
Location: UK

Re: Reflection on Father's day

Post by Gyppo » Thu Jun 25, 2020 10:07 am

I easily pictured myself and my Sis in this poem.  We're not 'huggy', but we're close.  So much in common, so much shared history, and a countless times when a shared nod or a raised eyebrow says all we need to say.

Gyppo
I've been writing ever since I realised I could.  Storytelling since I started talking.  Poetry however comes and goes  ;-)

ajduclos
Posts: 835
Joined: Mon Apr 01, 2019 7:35 pm

Re: Reflection on Father's day

Post by ajduclos » Fri Jun 26, 2020 11:41 am

Ah Gyppo - this is so sweet and melancholy, yet joyful, tender and warmly telling it as it is.  Allows the reader to easily immerse into the moment and the scene, and reflect.  Yes, the wonder of family, few words needed.
Aj 

ajduclos
Posts: 835
Joined: Mon Apr 01, 2019 7:35 pm

Re: Reflection on Father's day

Post by ajduclos » Sat Jun 27, 2020 1:33 pm

Ok - I'm definitely losing it............. Indar, my comments just above were meant for you, for your sweet and painful poem.
I got confused, I think, because of Gyppo's touching comments.
Hope you are well.
Aj

indar
Posts: 1747
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 3:00 pm

Re: Reflection on Father's day

Post by indar » Sat Jun 27, 2020 8:31 pm

Thank you Gyppo,

There are few, if any, who share the family history like our siblings. Sometimes its necessary to do a reality check with them: did we really go through all that? Do I remember that crazy birthday party correctly? Did dad really say all that? 

And sometime we know when not to bring up something too horribly painful--then, as you say, is the time for the slight gesture of acknowledgement and that's enough. Appreciate you comments.

Thank you AJ,

I'll bet you made the classic mistake of seeing Gyppo's name in the comment section. You are not losing it, you are a typical forum user. I appreciate all comments on my poem no matter who they were addressed to. Thanks for revisiting ;) 

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