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by poet-e
Mon Jun 15, 2020 12:54 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: He Died? (in Searching for Kadesh collection)
Replies: 0
Views: 13994

He Died? (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

He Died?   He died.             Who died? The man from Nazareth.             I don’t understand.                         They crucified him.                                     Who?                         His people.                                     Why?                                         ...
by poet-e
Sun Jun 14, 2020 5:59 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Nabal Means Fool (in Searching for Kadesh collection)
Replies: 9
Views: 5968

Re: Nabal Means Fool (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

. Hmm... that's a rather difficult challenge...are we talking dialogue-only poeming or is there narrative as well...? direct or indirect speech = active vs passive voice...how many characters' voices...and what is the POV, e.g. third person omniscient or what... yada yada. So these questions, as yo...
by poet-e
Fri Jun 12, 2020 12:55 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Our Donkey (in Searching for Kadesh collection)
Replies: 0
Views: 13843

Our Donkey (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Our Donkey My brother would carry me on his back to the stall, on nights we both couldn’t sleep.  Our donkey waiting for us there— the only one penned.  Whenever we could scavenge scraps, we’d bring it whatever we had.  I’d feed it, my brother still supporting me on his back.  My brother hugging my...
by poet-e
Fri Jun 12, 2020 12:05 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Dreaming of Home (in Searching for Kadesh collection)
Replies: 0
Views: 13463

Dreaming of Home (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Dreaming of Home   She stands in the doorway; welcoming me with a warm worn wrinkled face, hardened ashy callused hands, nails dulled down by working the orchard soil.  The embraces I long for are still missing. But the off white walls baking in the scolding sun invite me in, telling me how much th...
by poet-e
Fri Jun 12, 2020 12:01 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Castle/Warehouses In The Sky
Replies: 8
Views: 5404

Re: Castle/Warehouses In The Sky

So they send plastic bags to recycle/donate clothes?

There's irony in the recycling.

Nice write!
by poet-e
Fri Jun 12, 2020 11:51 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: She loved...
Replies: 5
Views: 3626

Re: She loved...

Love the 1st and 4th stanzas!  Great imagery.
Middle two Ss seem weaker.
by poet-e
Fri Jun 12, 2020 11:47 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: a new fairy tale to add to NaPo collection
Replies: 7
Views: 4617

Re: a new fairy tale to add to NaPo collection

Nice end.  I'd like more imagery; what'd prince looked like, etc.
by poet-e
Fri Jun 12, 2020 10:46 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: ASPCA
Replies: 4
Views: 3027

Re: ASPCA

Interesting irony.  Dogs amid violence vs non-violence.  The title fits well in that struggle b/c ASPCA is no kill, right?  But I do wonder why ASPCA is the title since it's not a part of the poem. I love dogs, but heard a theory we conform them to our needs--leashed, fenced, etc.  Instead of roamin...
by poet-e
Fri Jun 12, 2020 10:32 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Nabal Means Fool (in Searching for Kadesh collection)
Replies: 9
Views: 5968

Re: Nabal Means Fool (in Searching for Kadesh collection)

Thank you both for your feedback! I do like the way you employ typographical structure to embellish your writing but it also needs to be difficult to emulate, to acquire any gravitas beyond instant creativity and to withstand the perhaps silent criticism of more orthodox poets. It's simply just too ...
by poet-e
Fri Jun 12, 2020 10:20 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: No Spring Chicken
Replies: 1
Views: 1755

Re: No Spring Chicken

LOL.  I feel old too.  Funny, but is feeling old supposed to be sad?