The Tangled Branch Discussion Forums

Twenty years you shaped bread
with a house brick geometry,
and life hunkered down
to yellow parallels of law:
an infinite stupor
of underwhelming light.
So I surmised, ignoring the niche,
that glitch of human mechanics,
that must do experiment.
I unplugged the ritual of rules.
Now this tricky trigonometry
encompasses my head.
True, there is ambush distraction
in the ring of Saturn's bling
but inside, this teenage escapade,
the way the random rain plays a rum
of shanties, unanchors a ship.
So I digest lunch, munching theories,
equating this incline of change:
Cheddar sandwiches sliced
to hypotenuse finesse.
I square crusty lines and find
the childhood formula to erase a parallel
of fraying frowns. Triangular proof
measures a skinful of truth: the maths
of joy is never far away. I unscrew
a bottle of procreative rum, unparcel
my mustachio grin, unfurl myself as 'Roger'.




 

Jolly write Phil,

Usually my head hurts when confronted with anything mathematical but you put a whole new spin on it. So glad a little rum can overcome an obsession with nice, neat formulas, shapes and regulation. And speaking of rum I loved "rum of shanties". Ahoy Matey.

Hi Phil,

I'm reading this in thirds and see a teenager rebelling against being brought into the family business that requires doing the same thing perfectly every day. I'm struggling a bit to interpret what happens once this young person escapes the stupor of rules but when their eyes open again they see that maybe that they didn't need to run from an insistence on perfection; what they needed was a niche of their own.

I wonder if there's a way to write the three sections of the poem in three different voices, if that is what they are.

Very interesting read, thanks!

Jackie

 

So glad a little rum can overcome an obsession with nice, neat formulas, shapes and regulation.

A success

I'm reading this in thirds and see a teenager rebelling against being brought into the family business that requires doing the same thing perfectly every day.

I intended a tale of infidelity and frivolous justification!

Thank you Jackie and Linda

cheers

Phil

Oops!

I intended a tale of infidelity and frivolous justification!

Carry on!

I must say, I'd not thought to compare it to piracy but I suppose that works.